Game Land is the main setting of the video game Angry Video Game Nerd Adventures. It is the digital locality of all of the shitty games the Nerd has played over the years. After he and his friends were sucked into Game Land, they all traversed the mountains, plains, and platforms to find their way out.
"What a horrible night to have a curse...the curse of being stuck in a shitty game!"
The over-all outline and name of the stage is an obvious parody of the NES classic, Castlevania. The Nerd must travel the stone church with the navy blue sky covering the level via the windows. The enemies include spinning chained spike balls, zombies, ghosts, dropping spike platforms, fire balls, axe throwing knights, death blocks, and spikes. The boss is Mr. Hyde. The hulking, yellow coated beast is completely immune to any form of damage, as he stated himself in a text box. All he does is jump around the arena and shoot barrages of psycho-waves at the Nerd. What the player must do to beat him is to avoid him as much as possible and stay alive long enough for him to transform into a harmless Jekyll, where he is then able to be damaged. However, he will turn back into Hyde, and the cycle will continue till his death, beating the level.
The dark blue night sky coating the stage and the reddish orange blocks that the Nerd jumps upon gives the level a very spooky tone, and the two cameos include Brental Floss and Andre the Black Nerd. Another cameo in the stage, is the Moon from The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask.
Happy Fun Candy Time
"What...the...fuck...it's like a unicorn had severe diarrhea everywhere!"
—--The Nerd making a comment on the level's happy layout
As the level's name suggests, the stage is disgustingly happy, as almost every single object in it is bright and smiling with a pink sky, beautiful growing grass, and joyous blue mountains in the background. Its obstacles are spikes, spiked trap blocks, flying smiling faces, winged heads, death blocks, and Barney's missing testicles. The boss is, as the Nerd assumed, a flying unicorn defecating rainbows everywhere. These rainbows are the unicorn's main form of attack and it will fly around the stage in a wave pattern. It'll eventually get faster and the Nerd must shoot it out of the air and defeat it before its speed and projectiles overwhelm the player. The smiling faces with the spikes are reminiscent of the Air Tikis in Megaman 2.
The two (or rather three) cameos are Wiz and Boomstick and Keith Apicary.
Future Fuckballs 2010
"Sure, this was what 2010 was like. Puke green blocks and purple jellyfish."
The stage and name is a reference to Street Fighter 2010 and how poorly it predicted the year 2010. As the Nerd just stated in the quote, it has a futuristic layout of a chrome coat of purple and green, as well as wall sized windows revealing a city's dark skyline outside. Its enemies are purple jellyfish, mounted laser beams, death blocks, jet-packed astronauts, R.O.Bs, moving death blocks, spinning energy balls, and scrotum cannons. In the middle of the level, the Nerd hops on a Silver surfboard and soars through the stage on it. The rivals on the surfing part are eye-ball ropes and scrotum missiles, as well as the aforementioned enemies in the running level part of the stage. The boss is the Where-Did-You-Learn-To-Fly Bitch (Skylar from Cybermorph). She flies in a loop pattern as mini-faces of her (she refers to these faces as her children) circle around her like a shield. The Nerd must shoot the faces out the air and out of the way. Once all the children are down, the boss rages and starts firing beams of light in almost all directs while soaring through the air in a V-pattern violently. After the dodging her projectiles, flight pattern, and shoot her enough, she'll go down, ending with the Nerd quoting yet again, "Where did you learn to be an asshole?!"
The only cameo is Matthew Lentz, but this is the stage the player can find the playable Guitar Guy.
Blizzard of Balls
"A snow level! They're really bringing out the originality, aren't they?"
With festive Christmas trees and the night sky decorating the background and slippery snow and ice decorating the foreground, the stage is obviously a snow-themed Christmas level. It has death blocks, snow ball launchers, defecating birds, snow boulder spitting snow men, defecating reindeer, spikes, and snowmen angels. The player then stumbles into a dark, icy cave that has fire spewers (which is purposely ironic and unrealistic) before rising back onto the icy slopes again to fight Santa Claus, who is throwing presents (which fly in an arch) out of his sack at the Nerd . After putting the old man down, the player jumps on his corpse and rides it down the mountain like a snowboard with a rapid barrage of presents being flung at the player. The boss are the three ghosts of Christmas that fly in a wave pattern that all soar in different directions and can only be hit when they come together and cross paths for a split second, ending with the second death of these bosses.
The two cameos are Egoraptor and Angry Joe.
Thy Farts Consumed
"Welcome to hell! I guess?"
—--The Nerd upon witnessing the hellish stage
Having red stalactites hang from the "ceiling" and fiery scarlet blocks with demonic faces etched into all of them, this stage is truly the most stereotypically hellish a video game stage could get. The lethal enemies and objects list includes green arrow shooters, fire spewers, flying flaming skulls, death blocks, fire balls, spikes, bloody ghostly faces, and large, flying, eyed spheres of feces that spit out smaller spheres of feces. Once the player reaches the floor, an ocean of lava is all that is seen. This is until suddenly, a lava great white shark jumps out of the sea and attacks the player. One is to shoot the shark until it lands and floats in the lava on its stomach. You then ride it through the volcanic terrain, as it shoots lasers out of its face, a very over-the-top, silly part of the stage that even the Nerd labels ridiculous. The shark surfing eventually ends and gets on a usual bridge to the boss, Satan. The demon drops from the ceiling and pushes the Nerd through the ground, as they both fall into an almost bottomless pit. One must simply shoot the lord of all evil while he flies around the falling screen while gardens of floating death blocks must be avoided. As the Devil is defeated, the level is beaten.
The two cameos are the pair Craig and Chad. The whole level is a parody of Doom's "Thy Flesh Consumed".
Dungeons and Dickholes
"Oh, not a fucking fantasy level. At least it's not online."
Parodying the fantasy genre overall (though its name is an obvious reference to Dungeons and Dragons), the player spawns in a lovely forest blanketed by the dusk sky and has large, Sonic like mushshrooms decorating the background. The stage's deadly objects and entities include dinosaur-like birds shitting, spikes, death blocks, bats, crawling squid-like creatures, and fireballs, as well as the exaggerated Super Pitfall death trap . The player later enters, as the title suggested, an underground dungeon. A new mechanic made specifically for this level is also introduced, being the necessity to find keys and use them to unlock doors to advance forward. The player later rises out of the tunnel, back into the woods, and rides a small dragon through the trees. The ride leads to the boss, The Giant Claw from Manos: The Hands of Fate (another game developed by Freakzone Games based on the movie). The player must avoid the wavey lines of fires being spewed from the claw's mouth as well as the death blocks being thrown at them. After shooting the claw's head off in a bloody mess, the level is finished.
The pair of cameos appear in this stage, them being Mr. Destructiod and Jim Sterling. In this level you get Mike Matei as a playable character.
Beat It and Eat It
"What the hell happened to the graphics here? Is this suppose to be porno?"
—--The Nerd noticing the sexual layout and Atari style graphics
The stage is a parody of the Atari porno game with the same name. The background is a stroby strip club with twerking, naked women in the background. The floors are covered with, of course, puddles of semen, which are highlighted by the neon colors being flashed at the watcher.
The enemies include circling star fishes, dildos that shoot out of the ground like spikes, naked men with their penis out hovering over the player violently lunging their exposed junk downwards, floating breasts, death blocks, and naked witches on brooms. After traveling through the classic strip club, the player can head into the VIP room. Once one enters, the boss appears. It is a naked General Custer from his infamous Atari game in the middle of a desert. The sand is drowned in semen and a naked native American is tied to a nearby cactus. All the general does is jump around as spears rain down upon the stage. All the player must do is avoid these two attacks and gun the general down.
"Wow! I've always fuckin' loved not being able to see where I'm going! Thanks!"
As evidented by its name, the layout is a stereotypical haunted house (referencing the Nightmare on Elm Street episode where the Nerd sees how the game is less about Freddy and more about Halloween, so they should've just called it such a title) However, the background more resembles Freddy Kruger's nightmare world and the entire stage ahead of the player is pitch black, being a tunnel vision view. This mechanic makes it so this one of the most frustrating levels in the game, as the player must know what's ahead of them by trial and error, luck, and/or skill. The stage has death blocks, zombies, Ghostbuster ghosts, spikes, witches on brooms, pumpkins, and bats. Throughout the stage, Freddy Krueger's glove is constantly taunting to you and is the final boss once you meet him, along with Jason Voorhees backing him up. However, to avoid copyright infringement and make references to Double Dragon III's infamous typo (instead of calling the characters Billy and Jimmy, it's Bimmy and Jimmy), Freddy is called Bimmy and Jason is called Jimmy. This is one of the most simple bosses of the game, as all the player must do is shoot Bimmy, who is hovering over the stage and constantly lunges downwards as the only form of attack, and Jimmy, who is sprinting back and forth with a chainsaw jagged out of his hands.
"A rainbow computer? Is this where they generate all of their shit from?"
—--The Nerd upon viewing the final stage
The ninth and final level is none other that Laughin' Jokin' Numbnuts, and can only be unlocked once the player beats the eight previous stages. It is a stroby, Tron-like stage that resembles the chip of a computer, but everything is rainbow and black, matching LJN's logo. The level is unbelievably unfair and has almost every type of enemy imaginable and every type of cheating death trap a human could come up with. These hazards include rainbow mounted laser beams, scrotum missiles, spikes, spinning rainbows, fire spewers, death blocks, lava sharks, floating flaming skulls, and jet packed astronauts. The player then hops on a silver surfboard and a legitimate barrages of all of the aforementioned enemies are flung at the player simultaneously, even witches. When the player finally lands, they enter the last room of the game.
A mysterious voice begins to speak to the Nerd, surprised he got so far. The Nerd questions the figure's identity and he reveals himself. The final boss of the game is who else but Fred Fuchs (Who were you expecting?). The video game programmer dons a jetpack and flies around the stage launching fire balls out of his bare hands, a pair of spiked balls will spawn and swing around his crotch, will involuntarily defecate all over the arena, a third larger and longer ball dangles from his back and swings about, which turn into four until Fuchs is finally defeated when the player avoids all the just listed attacks and shoot him down. With the programmer of Game Land "dead", the world starts to fall apart and collapse on in itself. As the remains of the gaming world explodes, the Nerd and his friends are flung out of the TV and back into the real world.